I Have Not Forgotten

Rabbi Melanie Aron

August 24, 2002

Ever since Freud we tend to analyze and interpret mistakes and slips of the tongue. When we say something that we may have meant, but didn't really want to say aloud, we call that a Freudian slip. Sometimes we read meaning into things we forget as well. I remember a morning in the spring about two years ago when I almost forgot to include the Kaddish in our service. I might say I was having a very bad morning, but a psychoanalytically trained congregant asked me if someone's recent death had been particularly difficult.

For me this year, the two most interesting words in this week's Torah portion are Lo Shachachti, I have not forgotten. There words are found towards the beginning of the portion, in the section where the first fruits, and the tithe, are presented in the Temple. The Israelite farmer making the presentation says: "I have cleared out the consecrated things from my home and given to the poor, the stranger, the Levite, the widow and the orphan according to the commandment. I have not transgressed. I have not forgotten."

The rabbis find this curious. If he is in the Temple with his offering in hand, of course he hasn't forgotten. If he'd forgotten, he'd still be home in bed.

The commentaries note that this Lo Shachachti means much more than the simple translation of the words. When this Israelite says "I have not forgotten" he is saying "I have not forgotten my history and the history of my people". He is saying "I have not forgotten my communal responsibilities and at this time when I have arrived, and fulfilled all my dreams, I have not forgotten that things weren't always this way for me".

Further the rabbis say, he is saying that he is not doing this absentmindedly, or by rote, in a distracted way or mechanically by force of habit. If you fulfill the mitzvah while your heart and brain are doing something else, than it would be possible for you to have fulfilled the commandment, but, as it were, also at the same time to have forgotten it. According to the Gere rebbe, by saying Lo Shachachti you are saying something also about the kavannah, the intentionality with which you perform this mitzvah.

Further, there is the connection between these words "I did not forget" towards the beginning of this week's Torah portion, and the conclusion of last week's Parshah with the words "Zachor Remember Amalek". Rabbi Shlomo Riskin, the Orthodox rabbi in Efrat, explains that when the Israelite farmer says "I did not forget", he means he did not forget Amalek.

The Amalekites as you recalled attacked the Israelites from the rear, striking those most vulnerable, the nechshalim, the stragglers, old people, women and children. By bringing his tithe to share with the widow, orphan, stranger and Levites, the Israelite farmer is showing that he remembers not to prey on the weak and disadvantaged.

Finally, there is an Ellul message in these words. As we prepare for the high holidays and review our actions in the past year, we realize that we did not always rise to the standard of "I did not forget". Sometimes we did forget, we forgot our connection with our history or our commitment to those in the community who needed our help. Our good intentions got lost: we had the impulse to call, to visit, to write a letter, to help in some way, but the time came and we forgot. As we prepare for Rosh Hashanah, let us review those opportunities to do good that were forgotten. We may not find in them deep meaning along the lines of Sigmund Freud, but we may at least find ways of remembering more in the year to come.